Tuesday, July 22, 2014

I need an outlet

It's not supposed to happen like this
I'm so scared.
I can't stop, but do I want to?
Why force myself out of happiness?

He's motivated, encouraging, and all around beautiful
This one's different
I can't stop, and I definitely don't want to
Why does this feel so good?

All of the years I thought I had wasted
I'll never go back
I can't stop, full speed ahead
Why couldn't he have come along sooner?

Everything happens for a reason, I assume
I'm so extremely happy
I can't stop, not sure I ever will
What if I get hurt, or worse.. he does?

I'll never allow that to happen to us
He's mine all mine
I can't stop, not without a fight
Why do guys like him cease to exist?

As long as he's with me, I'll be here
In a state of pure happiness
I can't stop, and that's okay
Is this what love is supposed to feel like?



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I've not done this in a long time. I used to write poems all the time. For me, it's such a great outlet. I enjoy it thoroughly. I know it's mushy but, get over it.

I finally got to see Samoa last night! He came home a day early and my heart is soooo full right now. He keeps asking me questions that make me nervous as far as how I feel about him. I am freaking out right now. This is not how it's ever been. It's never been this easy. I am so used to having to impress a guy or go out of my way to show that I like him. With Samoa.. all I have to do is be my normal self without all the bells and whistles. I love it. I don't want it to stop.

So here's the thing.. If things get super serious (MONTHS maybe a YEAR) from now.. my blog will no longer be anonymous. I'll still be a blogger FOR SURE. And I'll still have dating tips, online dating stories, etc. This is part of our story, and I enjoy blogging so that's never going to end..I hope. But stay tuned because maybe just maybe one of these days..you'll get to see the real me :)

Love you all so much <3 Every read/comment means SO much to me.





28 comments:

  1. Those exact feelings in your poem are the same things I STILL experience with Pai. The first time he told me he loved me, instead of euphoria, I felt scared. The weight of the word means so much! It's amazing to be loved by someone, though, and to love them back :)

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  2. OMG dancing around for you right now!!!!!! AHHHHH

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  3. Isn't that what dating is all about, finding feelings like this? I'm so happy for you and keeping my fingers crossed, I'm excited to see how your blog will evolve ;)

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  4. Glad you find blogging to be such a therapeutic outlet!


    Xo, Michelle
    mash-elle.blogspot.com

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  5. Hugs sweet girl! So glad to see you're so happy :)

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  6. Love the words and inspiration!

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  7. This makes me so happy lady! Also, I feel like I know the real you, just not your real name because of what you share :P

    I used to write poems all the time, too!!

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  8. This is awesome!! So exciting! :) And I'm glad you will continue to blog, too ;)

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  9. Yvonne RhinehartJuly 22, 2014 at 7:20 PM

    That's awesome. I'm glad things are going well.

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  10. I'm so happy you keep blogging after all, and makes me even more happy that we're finally going to meet the real you, so happy!

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  11. So beautiful! I'm glad that you're able to get back into writing poetry. This was awesome, and you should definitely keep doing it. So happy that you're happy. When you're with the right person, it's supposed to be easy! Yay for love.

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  12. I'm so scared Nina..seriously.. what if I lose him? He's everything I've been looking for in a MAN..he's a MAN not a stupid childish immature boy.. Ahhh I hope I get enough courage to love him.

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  13. Thanks girl :) I'm still in the freaked out, "Is this really happenening?" Stage.. but so grateful for the support!!

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  14. Thanks girl I need all the luck I can get. These feelings are something I've never experienced before!! I'm excited for the blog, too!! :)

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  15. I honestly don't know what I'd do without this blog some days. It relieves SO much stress.

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  16. Thank you!! :) I am very happy, but also kinda freaking out a bit lol. I always could use hugs!

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  17. Thank you! I'm not a professional poet or anything like that, but sometimes it's the best stress reliever!

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  18. I know!!! I loveee our relationship and how it's growing. It's almost like you and I grew up together and now you live super far away and we're able to keep up by our blogs. & Really!?! Good I'm not alone in the inner poet society. I haven't written in a LONG time. I'm glad I got this out though :)

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  19. Thank you :) I enjoy writing these things on occasion :) & I am too. I am sort of addicted to my blog, it's my baby!

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  20. Thanks hun :) I'm scared but happy at the same time!

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  21. Hopefully one day soon!! :) (meaning a few months from now) But yes, the blog is not going anywhere!! I'm too in love with it!

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  22. Thank you so much :) I'm going to try and keep writing, it's just very relaxing and relieves so much stress :)

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  23. One of my favorite things is happy couples :) :) :) I love that you found this guy!

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  24. Girl i have those SAME. Exact feelings. God will give you the courage if this is centered around Him! :)

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  25. Beautiful!!! So happy for you!!! Glad you will keep blogging regardless of what happens!!

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  26. It's become my favorite thing as well :) I love it too!! Thanks for the support :)

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  27. Awh thanks dear :) The blog's not going anywhere!!

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  28. haha AH! I feel the same way!!! Blog friends are the best!! Also, did you ever write on Allpoetry.com?

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