So before my official dating site hiatus, there were a couple of profiles I had stumbled upon that caught my attention. - and not necessarily in a positive way!
There are a couple of different options to choose from regarding your relationship status. Typically I thought everyone just clicks single, but there is more than one type of single of course. There is the single-never been married/ single-divorced/ & single-parent, but there is one option that always made me wonder:
Married.
I didn't understand why that would be even an option for a DATING site. Are people attracted to that? I know a lot of people use dating sites for sex and hookups, but really?! For married people?
Here is one example that totally grossed me out. (taken from a person's about me, so sorry about the grammar)
"my wife and me need some extra lovers to come out an play wit us and we could have lots of fun wit ya if you are interested. we like to mix things up and party a lot. if you want to hang with us we can make it happen ;)"
Idk about you, but cue gag reflex. Seriously just threw up in my mouth a bit. And I'm not judging a book by it's cover by no means, but the pictures made it even worse.
My friend is using some of the dating sites I've previously used, and she stumbled upon one that said Separated. So awesome! You aren't divorced, you're still married, no issues there....
I never understood separation. I mean if you need a break I can understand that, but you can date other people? I wouldn't want my significant other dating..if it's over..then get divorced. Don't hop on a dating site to find the reason to get divorced. Just do it.
Bottom line.. there are creepy people on these sites. But for some reason, it's sort of addicting. Meeting new people and having that small hope that one day you'll meet someone and be on that commercial talking about how you met each other online and now you're married with kids.
Hopeless Romantic I guess...
Gimme Love
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Distance
Some of the guys that have either smiled, messaged, or favorited me have been forever away!!
Okay, so remember my post about meeting in person? Yeah. That plays a factor in whether I continue my conversation. How terribly wrong of me is it to want to meet you when you are literally about 15 hours away (driving) when you are sooooooo cute and have all of the necessary qualifications?!
It's very wrong.
You've seen Catfish. HELLO!? I am not going to talk to you and let you explain to me how perfect of a man you are, then contact Nev Schulman and say, "I'm so in love with him! Please help me meet him."
Get my one hour of fame on the show, then be publicly embarrassed because you are a 52 year old man who is unemployed and living in your mother's basement.
Okay, over exaggeration there, but come on.
Also, don't give me the, "How about we just chat a bit and see where things go?"
Buddy I'll tell ya right now, things AREN'T going to get you nude pics, a fake relationship,or a mail-order-bride. Sorry to get your hopes up!
small rant for the day ;)
Okay, so remember my post about meeting in person? Yeah. That plays a factor in whether I continue my conversation. How terribly wrong of me is it to want to meet you when you are literally about 15 hours away (driving) when you are sooooooo cute and have all of the necessary qualifications?!
It's very wrong.
You've seen Catfish. HELLO!? I am not going to talk to you and let you explain to me how perfect of a man you are, then contact Nev Schulman and say, "I'm so in love with him! Please help me meet him."
Get my one hour of fame on the show, then be publicly embarrassed because you are a 52 year old man who is unemployed and living in your mother's basement.
Okay, over exaggeration there, but come on.
Also, don't give me the, "How about we just chat a bit and see where things go?"
Buddy I'll tell ya right now, things AREN'T going to get you nude pics, a fake relationship,or a mail-order-bride. Sorry to get your hopes up!
small rant for the day ;)
Monday, July 29, 2013
Social Hiatus
I think it's time for me to take a break from the dating site. But I still have plenty of stories to share from previous experiences.
Being stood up a total of 3 times in one weekend can really put a damper on your self-esteem and emotions. It's hard being a single lady with guys promising these fantastic dates and getting all excited about that free meal and movie, just to have your excitement torn apart by them not following through.
-long post ahead - my weekend in detail:
Friday night:
Date planned with a guy who I wasn't exactly excited about meeting, but he also knew that I was hesitant with him because he has 3 children, by 2 different mothers. . .I was straight up with him about the fact that I wasn't necessarily comfortable with this situation. He INSISTED that we go out on a date. He really really really wanted to meet me, or so I thought. Met at Texas Roadhouse at 7, I texted him told him I was there...
We both have the iPhone and his read receipts were on, so I knew with every message I sent him he read almost immediately after I sent them.
"I'm here" - read at 7:02 p.m.
"Can't wait to see you!" - read at 7:10 p.m.
"Let me know when you're close" - read at 7:18 p.m.
"Everything okay?" - read at 7:24 p.m.
- By 7:30 I realized he wasn't coming. So, I went home - and not going to lie - picked up some Mike's Cranberry Lemonade to take with me.
Saturday evening:
Really really really really like this guy, but he wasn't available to hang out until really late because he was hanging out with some guy friends because his buddy is getting married next weekend. He knew I was stood up the night before, but good news - we did get to meet!
I did something really dangerous and let him come see me at my apt, because I had been drinking (Mikes of course) and it wasn't the best idea to meet him somewhere at midnight. I had let my friend who lived close by know what was happening and had my call 911 text ready to go before he pulled in just in case! When he got there I was soooo happy to see him, he was just like his pictures and soooo adorable. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. He gave me a hug and smelled good (PLUS!). So we sat on the couch and watched tv & talked for a couple hours, but he was kind of distant (as in 2 couch cushions away), so I wasn't sure if he was interested or not. So he decided it was time for him to leave because he had to be up at 8 a.m. to take his roommate (who doesn't have a car) to work, and we were nearing 4:30 a.m.
Before he left, another hug :) and he said, "I'll get up with you tomorrow okay?" - cue the massive idiotic smile. So I go to bed thinking, YAY I get to see him tomorrow I'm so excited!
Sunday:
So I wake up pretty early considering I had only slept for about 5 hours. It's a GORGEOUS day so I take a shower go ahead and put makeup on because if he wakes up and wants to hang out- I wanna be ready to go! The sun is out and hitting my porch at the perfect angle so I put on a tank and short shorts and go lay out in the sun! Have a great romance novel in my hands and Pandora blaring :) 1:00 p.m. rolls around and I figure maybe he's awake now. I'll text him . . . "Good morning sunshine!" I wasn't expecting an immediate response so I just continue enjoying my day with the sun, a book, and my music. 2:30 p.m. arrives so I send him another text, "You should wake up ;) Just sayin..."
He sends one a little later sayin "I don't wanna :("
"Yeah you do! :)" - me
....nothing
So I go about my day, go to the grocery store, typical Sunday. Clean the apt up a bit. and I'm texting a guy friend who I decided to give a second chance after he stood me up a couple weeks ago.
(Back story- we went on about 3 dates and were getting really close, but kind of in the same situation as the douche from Friday night. 4th date planned he stood me up and kept reading my texts then claimed by 9 p.m. that he was just getting to his phone. )
But he really wanted another chance so I gave him one. He wanted me to come see his new apartment (He lives about 30 mins away from me). I figured since the cutie from the night before wasn't going out of his way to see me, why not. So I agree to come see him. I know which exit to take but I hadn't gotten his address yet.
"Let me know when you're about to leave :) " - him
"Okay give me til about 5:00 p.m. and I'll be on my way!" - me
"Okay :)" - him
"Alright I'm leaving! Gotta drop off a redbox then I'll be getting on the interstate! Text me your address" - me
I call him - no answer
"Hang on Landlord's here" - him ( 5:05 p.m.)
"Oh okay, is everything alright?"
"Yeah she's looking at a water spot in the other room" - him
"Well what's your address?" - me
"I'm on the interstate, I don't know where to go!" - me
"Idk where to go?" - me
- I call him again - no answer. . . again
"Your landlord has been there for over an hour now...really? On a Sunday? I'm not stupid." - me
"I'm going back now" - me
"We're waiting on maintenance to bring the wet vac thing to suck up the water in the room" - him
"I'm already on my way back home" - me
"Sorry" - him
"One simple text - is that too much to ask for?! This isn't going to work (his name) - good luck to you" - me
- read at 6:03 p.m.
no response. . . douche
So on my way back I text cutie from the night before (i'm not in a very good mood at this point but maybe he can change that)
"dinner?"
Haven't heard from him since..
It'd be nice to have someone actually follow through with what they say to you, ya know?
Anyway, I'm not going to get myself down any more about it. Just gotta take a break from the dating stuff for a bit, because all of this playing games and crap. It's no fun!
footnote:
Guys: follow through.
Being stood up a total of 3 times in one weekend can really put a damper on your self-esteem and emotions. It's hard being a single lady with guys promising these fantastic dates and getting all excited about that free meal and movie, just to have your excitement torn apart by them not following through.
-long post ahead - my weekend in detail:
Friday night:
Date planned with a guy who I wasn't exactly excited about meeting, but he also knew that I was hesitant with him because he has 3 children, by 2 different mothers. . .I was straight up with him about the fact that I wasn't necessarily comfortable with this situation. He INSISTED that we go out on a date. He really really really wanted to meet me, or so I thought. Met at Texas Roadhouse at 7, I texted him told him I was there...
We both have the iPhone and his read receipts were on, so I knew with every message I sent him he read almost immediately after I sent them.
"I'm here" - read at 7:02 p.m.
"Can't wait to see you!" - read at 7:10 p.m.
"Let me know when you're close" - read at 7:18 p.m.
"Everything okay?" - read at 7:24 p.m.
- By 7:30 I realized he wasn't coming. So, I went home - and not going to lie - picked up some Mike's Cranberry Lemonade to take with me.
Saturday evening:
Really really really really like this guy, but he wasn't available to hang out until really late because he was hanging out with some guy friends because his buddy is getting married next weekend. He knew I was stood up the night before, but good news - we did get to meet!
I did something really dangerous and let him come see me at my apt, because I had been drinking (Mikes of course) and it wasn't the best idea to meet him somewhere at midnight. I had let my friend who lived close by know what was happening and had my call 911 text ready to go before he pulled in just in case! When he got there I was soooo happy to see him, he was just like his pictures and soooo adorable. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. He gave me a hug and smelled good (PLUS!). So we sat on the couch and watched tv & talked for a couple hours, but he was kind of distant (as in 2 couch cushions away), so I wasn't sure if he was interested or not. So he decided it was time for him to leave because he had to be up at 8 a.m. to take his roommate (who doesn't have a car) to work, and we were nearing 4:30 a.m.
Before he left, another hug :) and he said, "I'll get up with you tomorrow okay?" - cue the massive idiotic smile. So I go to bed thinking, YAY I get to see him tomorrow I'm so excited!
Sunday:
So I wake up pretty early considering I had only slept for about 5 hours. It's a GORGEOUS day so I take a shower go ahead and put makeup on because if he wakes up and wants to hang out- I wanna be ready to go! The sun is out and hitting my porch at the perfect angle so I put on a tank and short shorts and go lay out in the sun! Have a great romance novel in my hands and Pandora blaring :) 1:00 p.m. rolls around and I figure maybe he's awake now. I'll text him . . . "Good morning sunshine!" I wasn't expecting an immediate response so I just continue enjoying my day with the sun, a book, and my music. 2:30 p.m. arrives so I send him another text, "You should wake up ;) Just sayin..."
He sends one a little later sayin "I don't wanna :("
"Yeah you do! :)" - me
....nothing
So I go about my day, go to the grocery store, typical Sunday. Clean the apt up a bit. and I'm texting a guy friend who I decided to give a second chance after he stood me up a couple weeks ago.
(Back story- we went on about 3 dates and were getting really close, but kind of in the same situation as the douche from Friday night. 4th date planned he stood me up and kept reading my texts then claimed by 9 p.m. that he was just getting to his phone. )
But he really wanted another chance so I gave him one. He wanted me to come see his new apartment (He lives about 30 mins away from me). I figured since the cutie from the night before wasn't going out of his way to see me, why not. So I agree to come see him. I know which exit to take but I hadn't gotten his address yet.
"Let me know when you're about to leave :) " - him
"Okay give me til about 5:00 p.m. and I'll be on my way!" - me
"Okay :)" - him
"Alright I'm leaving! Gotta drop off a redbox then I'll be getting on the interstate! Text me your address" - me
I call him - no answer
"Hang on Landlord's here" - him ( 5:05 p.m.)
"Oh okay, is everything alright?"
"Yeah she's looking at a water spot in the other room" - him
"Well what's your address?" - me
"I'm on the interstate, I don't know where to go!" - me
"Idk where to go?" - me
- I call him again - no answer. . . again
"Your landlord has been there for over an hour now...really? On a Sunday? I'm not stupid." - me
"I'm going back now" - me
"We're waiting on maintenance to bring the wet vac thing to suck up the water in the room" - him
"I'm already on my way back home" - me
"Sorry" - him
"One simple text - is that too much to ask for?! This isn't going to work (his name) - good luck to you" - me
- read at 6:03 p.m.
no response. . . douche
So on my way back I text cutie from the night before (i'm not in a very good mood at this point but maybe he can change that)
"dinner?"
Haven't heard from him since..
It'd be nice to have someone actually follow through with what they say to you, ya know?
Anyway, I'm not going to get myself down any more about it. Just gotta take a break from the dating stuff for a bit, because all of this playing games and crap. It's no fun!
footnote:
Guys: follow through.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Mirror Image
I know we all would much rather show off pictures that are flattering. I am very guilty of it.
It happens to the best of us. . .
But there is a distinct difference in being caught off guard while the camera flashes vs. when you put older pictures of yourself when you looked better than you currently do now.
So you aren't as skinny as you used to be. That's a bummer, but if you want to meet dates in public and you are basically an extra person added onto your profile pictures from the dating site- you're going to get a very odd reaction.
Accept what you look like & embrace it. If you aren't happy with how you look now then do something about it.. instead of leading people to believe you look like you did 4 years & 100 pounds ago.
--
(Let's back up)
Just had a guy send me some pics through text and he looked super cute and the whole time I was thinking why is this guy single?! He's adorable! Then I asked him to send me a really recent one....
He literally was about 100 pounds more than the pictures he'd been sending. I would have still messaged him back if that picture was on his profile..because he was still attractive. I like bigger guys. But the fact that he was faking it and showing off old pictures that's kinda like lying ..I think lol.
What would have happened you ask? If we had met in person and he didn't text that recent pic? How would I react?
To be honest I would be nice but I probably wouldn't talk to him again. Lying isn't cool. Even if you are just embarrassed or ashamed. . . Lying will never be okay.
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